Why I See a Psychiatrist

Swiss Psychiatrist Dr. Carl Jung, Psychiatrist
“Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart.
Who looks outside dreams; who looks inside, awakens.”
~ Carl Jung

One thing most people don’t know about me is that I’ve been seeing a psychiatrist every week for almost four years. In the beginning, I was secretive about seeing a shrink. I didn’t want even my closest friends or family members to know. After all, doesn’t seeing a psychiatrist mean I am… *gulp*… “crazy”?

But in the past few months I’ve become much more open about my adventures in deep mind-space exploration. I’ve seen the transformation that has occurred as a result of my own psychotherapy, and most people I know could benefit from a few rounds of their own. It’s my genuine hope that this article inspires people to take charge of their mental and emotional health rather than run away from it.

I first started seeing a psychiatrist in the fall of 2006, after a bout of depression had gotten the best of me. I wasn’t eager about the prospect of discussing my life with a stranger, but my family doctor insisted. I tend to lose my appetite when I’m depressed, and I was down to about 115 lbs (I’m 5’9). My doc said if I lost any more weight, she would admit me into the hospital, so I reluctantly dragged myself into the dreaded psychiatrist’s office.

The first year on the couch was very difficult for me. Almost immediately, the floodgates opened and 30 years of suppressed emotion came pouring out all at once. It was then that I realized one of the primary intentions of psychotherapy: emotional processing.

Why I see a Psychiatrist: Emotional Processing

Looking back on my life (my childhood in particular), I realized that there were many times when I didn’t have the skills to be fully present with my emotions. In my experience when I wasn’t able to process an emotion, it became suppressed in my body. My personal belief is that these unreleased, pent-up emotions accumulate and eventually have disastrous effects on the physical body.

One of the reasons I believe we suppress our emotions is that experiencing them can be tiring as well as terrifying. During the first year of psychotherapy, I purposefully kept my schedule clear for 4 – 5 hours after each appointment. I would come home so exhausted from my emotional overload that I would have to have a 2 – 3 hour nap afterwards.

Over time, the intensity of my emotional release waned and I noticed a new intention emerge from my psychotherapy: objective perception.

Me, Myself, and I: Objective Perception

One of the nice things about talking to a psychiatrist about your life is that they maintain an objective view of your reality. They don’t know your friends; they don’t know your family. Their perception is undistorted by personal motives other than to help you achieve a greater level of mental and emotional health.

But eventually I began to notice a second objective perception in the room: my own.

As I sat on the couch and externalized my thoughts into words, I noticed that I too have the ability to “observe” myself from a distant, objective perspective. From this standpoint I am able excavate and examine my most subconscious beliefs on an intricate level. Paired with the knowing that my thoughts create my reality, the opportunity to uncover limiting beliefs has been one of the greatest gifts from all the time I’ve spent in my psychiatrist’s office.

Last week for example, I uncovered the subconscious belief I was holding that my psychiatrist’s intention was to negatively judge me rather than help me. As I listened to myself talk, I noticed that this negative expectation applies to ALL people I come in contact with, not just my doctor. So the question becomes, do I really want to walk around for the rest of my life harboring the expectation that others are judging me?? Or would I rather expect them to love and support me instead? Only now that I am aware of my perception, can I begin to make a new choice.

Dangers of Seeing a Psychiatrist: Victim Mentality

The one feasible danger I find in seeing a psychiatrist is the possibility of getting stuck in a victim mentality. If you’re a fairly unconscious person (ie – you think you ARE your story), the liability of seeing a psychiatrist lies in riding the hamster wheel of martyrdom.

The ordeals and adventures of your life are not accidental. They’ve been purposefully woven into your biography to help you experience, express, and evolve into a higher revelation of who you are. If you get stuck re-hashing the past because you believe there is victory in suffering, you’re on the wrong path. There is a big difference between emotional processing and emotional immobilization.

That being said, I do sometimes wonder how long I will continue to see a psychiatrist. In the beginning, I was eager for a timeline. “How long is this going to take?” I would repeatedly ask her.

But as time goes by, I find I don’t need an answer to that question. I no longer see a psychiatrist because I’m trying to get “better”. I see a psychiatrist because it has helped me reach goals, become healthier, and radiate more confidence. I’ll continue to see my shrink as long as I feel it’s helping me move forward.

And if that makes me crazy, so be it. :)

~

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The Power of Meditation

“If you want to find God, hang out in the space between your thoughts.”
~ Alan Cohen

I really can’t tell you how much I believe in the power of meditation… so much so that I traveled all the way to Cape Cod to film this vid with my friend and meditation teacher Andy Kelley (a.k.a. “The Boston Buddha”). A big thanks to Andy for helping me create this vid, his wife Catharine Uyenoyama for lending us gear, Darryl Lahteenmaa for all his hard work shooting and editing, Cailen Dye for the amazing music, and YOU for making a donation! Enjoy!

~

KB Recommends:

Wavelengths of Possibility

American Moon Landing

“It is difficult to say what is impossible…
for the dream of yesterday
is the hope of today
and reality of tomorrow.”
~ Robert Goddard

Although I received a ton of positive feedback from my blog last week about how thoughts become things, your emails reminded me that there is always room for clarification regarding just how this whole process works. One reader wrote:

“Though I would like to believe that thoughts become things, I am having a great struggle with it! There are many things I want to have and/or achieve, but I honestly don’t think they could ever happen. I have come to realize that my lack of belief is what holds me back in life. I would love to know your thoughts on this.”

My short and unfortunate answer to this question is “no, the things you want to have and achieve ARE NOT going to happen for you”… UNLESS you “think fast” and harness the power of focus to change your beliefs. I believe Henry Ford said it best, “whether you think you can or think you can’t… you’re right!”

You have to understand that the thought that “I can’t have or do something” is just that – a THOUGHT. Every thought you think is a wavelength of energy, which goes out ahead of you to mold your physical world. Therefore if you continue to think you can’t do something then you absolutely will not be able to do it.

Why won’t you be able to do it?

We have discussed many times before that your thoughts and beliefs are energetic substances vibrating at specific frequencies, but I’d like to point out that the goals and desires you hold for yourself are also vibrating at specific frequencies as energetic possibilities.

Every goal, dream, or desire you’ve ever had for your life exists as a possibility in the realm of pure consciousness. Let’s call this myriad of possible life paths, your “wavelengths of possibilities”.

Out of all the infinite potentialities for your life, you will only physically experience the wavelength of possibility that is on the same frequency as your dominant thoughts and beliefs. In other words, possibilities collapse into physical reality (waves into particles) based on how they are observed or focused upon in the non-physical world of energetics.

When you elevate your vibrational frequency within range of a “wavelength of possibility” you want to experience, you suddenly become receptive to “new” ideas, relationships, and opportunities that almost magically lead you to experience your thoughts as reality. These ideas, relationships, and opportunities aren’t really new, they have always existed… but now you are able to “tune” into them.

When you truly understand this, you realize that making your dreams come true is not a process of hard work or hours of external action. It is a process of bringing your thoughts and beliefs into harmony with the wavelength of possibility you want to physically experience.

My advice to my dear reader and to all of you is to ditch all thoughtforms and memories from your past that affirm you can’t do something, so you can finally begin to BELIEVE the words, “I know I can”. Even if it takes a few months of personal work, aren’t the new wavelengths of possibilities worth it??

~

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Thoughts Become Things

“Thoughts become things… choose the good ones!”
~ Mike Dooley

“Thoughts become things” is a familiar quote from the movie, “The Secret”. The phrase itself is a perfect synopsis for the film, which suggests that the thoughts we hold in our minds eventually materialize into our physical reality.

How does this work, you ask? The answer lies in the invisible world of energy that makes up our visible world of matter.

When scientists break down a piece of matter into smaller and smaller particles, eventually they find nothing there except pure energy. Since everything in our physical Universe is energy, anything you perceive as solid matter is really just a bundle of energy vibrating at a specific frequency.

Though our senses perceive everything and everyone as “separate”, in reality we are all interconnected through the field of energy that permeates all things. The energetic field that is “you” does not end at the boundaries of your physical body; but rather extends out in all directions and mingles with the matrix of energy that creates the Universe.

Our thoughts are less dense, finer forms of energy. When we “think” we send out energetic signals into this matrix of energy, telling it how to sculpt the world of matter. The more we focus our minds, the more powerful our thoughts become in molding the energy that creates the world.

In essence, the physical world of matter is just an effect or outpicturing of the non-physical world of consciousness.

With that in mind, the most effective way to create something new in your physical world is to approach it from an energetic level, molding the energy into physical form using the power of focused thought. For me, the most potent method of focusing my thoughts has been the practice of visualization.

Everyone has a unique way of visualizing, but I use a scrapbook called a vision book in which I paste pictures of things I’d like to experience. For 5 or 10 minutes every day, I use my vision book to help me imagine what I want to create. Here are three examples from my own life of visualizations that have manifested into physical form.

Manifesting an Object: The Baby Grand Piano

Three years ago I pasted this photo of a Yamaha baby grand piano in my vision book. In my mind, I thought it would be years and years before I had the space or the money for this piano, but I liked the thought of having it so I put it in there anyway.

About two months later, I went away for the weekend and when I came home, there was a Yamaha baby grand piano in my living room! No, it wasn’t exactly like the one in the photo; it was better!! This was a Yamaha CP70 – an electric grand piano from the 70’s that my husband Darryl bought on a whim.

When I saw the piano I started crying, because I was amazed and humbled by the power that had delivered my piano with ease and grace. I knew it wasn’t a coincidence even though Darryl had never seen the photo in my vision book and had no idea that I dreamt of owning a Yahama piano.

Manifesting an Experience: The Music Video

Another incredible example of thoughts becoming things was the time I found myself levitating 8 feet in the air for a music video.

From a young age I dreamed of making an appearance on MTV, and I used to visualize myself starring in my favorite video, which is “Bedtime Story” by Madonna. Using my imagination I would replace Madonna’s head with mine, particularly in one scene where Madonna is seen “levitating” in a hallway. I visualized myself in the video for fun and not because I actually thought it was going to happen, but little did I know that in time I would find myself re-creating a similar scene in real life.

In 2007 I received an email from a friend asking if I was interested in appearing in a music video. Her friend’s band was shooting a vid in Toronto the following week and was in need of a few extras. Though I hadn’t yet linked this exciting opportunity with my visualization, I agreed anyway.

Assuming I’d be cast as a blur in the background, I showed up for the early morning video shoot foggy-headed and half asleep. Luckily the casting director saw a diamond through the rough, and cast me in a special role, levitating above a fireplace next to Melissa Auf de Maur (you can watch the video on Youtube here; watch for my pivotal role at 2:53!). I was blown away when the video aired and I finally realized the similarity between my earlier Madonna visualization and my appearance in the video.

Manifesting a Relationship: Steve Pavlina

One of the pages in my vision book is entitled, “friends”. My friends page is full of pictures of inspiring people I’d like to meet or hang out with.

Last year I decided that one of the people I’d like to meet is Steve Pavlina, a well-known personal development blogger and writer from Las Vegas. I found a picture of Steve online for my vision book and took it a step further by Photoshopping my head next to him in the photo. Yes, I am a LOA nerd.

A couple months later I opened my Twitter account to discover that Steve had come across my videos on YouTube and had recommended them to all of his followers. We then began emailing back and forth and when I attended his workshop in January, his ex-partner Erin snapped this picture of us, which is very similar to the Photoshopped photo I have in my vision book.

Steve and I have a lot in common and are now good friends. Just last month, Steve and his girlfriend Rachelle came to stay with Darryl and I for a week as Rachelle performed in our local Fringe Festival. We had a great time together, enjoying many raw vegan meals as well as a day trip to Stratford.

I have to tell you it was a little surreal as Steve sat across from me at my kitchen table. I couldn’t help but grin as I remembered the ridiculous Photoshopped picture from my vision book.

Effortless Intention

I love these three stories because they are all great examples of how thoughts can manifest with little or no effort, demonstrating the power of effortless intention. In the words of Abraham, “it’s not your work to make anything happen; it’s your work to dream it and let it happen”.

Of course there are times when the manifestation of my dreams is a little less magical, like when I fulfilled my dream of owning a Vitamix blender simply by getting online and buying one.

Even still, I never cease to be amazed at the enchantment I feel when my interconnection with the Universe shapes my thoughts into things. :)

~

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Raw Vegan Diet for Beginners

“Every human being is the author of his own health or disease.”
~ Buddha

It’s been six months since I began eating a diet comprised mainly of raw vegan food. For those of you who are new to this way of living, raw vegans eat a healthy diet comprised of uncooked fruits and vegetables, nuts and nut butters, seeds, sprouted grains, plant oils, and fresh juice. Raw vegans do not consume animal products, dairy products, highly processed food, or any food heated above 115°F.

The intention of this article is not to persuade you to become a raw vegan; it is to inspire you to eat more healthily and more mindfully. I am passionate about encouraging others to eat well so they can savor each moment of their lives with a healthy body. Even those who are not willing or able to make major changes to their diets can incorporate a raw meal into their diet once in a while.

Benefits of the Raw Vegan Diet

The most common question I receive from people who discover I eat raw food is, “why the heck do you eat this way”, and although I could discuss animal rights, sustainability, or how cooking destroys micro-nutrients and enzymes in food, I find that the simplest answer is, “because it makes me look and feel great!”

Since I began to eat raw vegan food, my eyes are whiter, my hair is shinier, and my skin is clearer. I have more energy, feel more youthful, and sleep 100x more soundly. My mind feels “clearer” and I find writing blogs and articles easier. I also process my emotions more efficiently, because there are fewer foreign chemicals in my body that would otherwise suppress them.

Overall the most powerful advantage of the raw vegan diet has been the spiritual benefit – I feel much more connected to Source Energy and feel like I’m vibrating at a higher oscillation. This makes sense if you consider that all the food transforming into “me” is packed with high vibrational, nutritionally dense energy.

Raw Vegan Diet Appliances

I found it difficult to stick to the raw diet before I bought the appliances that make it possible to eat more than just fruit and salads. After buying a few appliances, eating raw was not only easy but also fun and exciting. I found myself making raw versions of all the standard American favorites – lasagnas, pizzas, pasta, pie, and brownies, to name a few.

Food Processor

The first appliance I bought for the raw food diet was a Kichenaid food processor. I decided on the Kitchenaid because it has some of the best consumer ratings and is very easy to use and clean.

The most important consideration when buying a food processor is the size of the work bowl. I bought the 7-cup model, which is fine for most recipes, but if I had to buy another one I would invest in the 12-cup Kitchenaid model.

I use my food processor almost every day to make guacamole, raw pie crusts, raw brownies, and sundried tomato hummus.

Dehydrator

I purchased a dehydrator in January and it’s the one appliance that makes it easy for me to eat 100% raw. With a dehydrator you can make all the food you might crave from a traditional diet, such as bread, crackers, pizza, lasagna, cookies, and more.

I invested in the Excalibur dehydrator because it is the most common dehydrator among the raw vegan community. The Excalibur dries food evenly and efficiently and features an accurate temperature control. It comes either as a 5-tray or a 9-tray model. I bought the 9-tray Excalibur and I’m so glad I did, because it allows me to dehydrate food in large batches. I use my dehydrator regularly to make bread, wraps, and kale chips.

Spiralizer

The Joyce Chen spiralizer is perhaps the most fun and least expensive appliance in my raw food kitchen. I use it all the time to quickly cut spagetti-like noodles out of zucchini. There’s also a setting to cut wider, ribbon-shaped noodles that are a fantastic accompaniment to white “fettuccini” sauces made from cashew or macadamia nuts. You can also use a spiralizer to cut sweet potatoes, parsnips, or any other firm vegetable.

Sprouting Jar

A sprouting jar is another inexpensive, fun addition for your raw food kitchen. This handy jar makes it easy to grow sprouts from raw grains, which you can either eat raw or use to make raw breads or crackers. Most of the time I use my jar to sprout buckwheat which I use to make raw pizza crusts.

Mandoline

A mandoline is not a crucial appliance for the raw food diet but it’s a great addition to your kitchen if you have the space to store it. It slices vegetables super-thin, so you can make sweet potato chips or zucchini “noodles” for raw lasagna. I bought a high-end, stainless steel mandoline exactly like this one on Amazon. I don’t use it all the time but when I have an urge to make zucchini lasagna, I’m always glad to have it around.

Juicer

A juicer is the only appliance I haven’t had to purchase myself as my friend David from Nashville sent me an Acme Juicerator! I use it quite a lot, especially near the end of the week when I need to use up any overripe fruits or vegetables. My favorite juice so far is a blend of carrots, oranges, and ginger, which I then pop into my Vitamix blender with some ice to make a healthy slushie.

Vitamix Blender

The Vitamix Blender is the most recent addition to my raw kitchen. After burning out 2 inexpensive blenders in 5 months with raw recipes, I decided to bite the bullet and buy the blender everyone raves about – the Vitamix. The Vitamix is one of the most powerful blenders on the market and comes with a 7-year warranty. It has a cult like following in the raw food world. :)

Many of my raw friends told me that after I bought a Vitamix, I wouldn’t know how I lived without it. I have certainly found that to be true. I’ve even decided to become a Vitamix distributor because I’m so excited about this appliance. You can check out the latest special deals from Vitamix here.

What makes the Vitamix so much better than other blenders is that it microscopically liquefies the ingredients, creating much smoother drinks, soups, and sauces. The consistency is much more palatable but according to Vitamix, it has nutritional benefits as well:

“The Vitamix machine ruptures food cells down to a microscopic level, making more of the health-giving nutrients locked inside readily available for digestion. Without breaking down the food cells with your Vitamix machine, more of the nutrients will pass through your body without providing you with any nourishment.”

The price of a Vitamix was the only reason I didn’t buy one several months ago, but I realized that if I continued with the pattern of burning out 3 consumer blenders a year, that in the long run buying a Vitamix blender was less expensive than buying a crappy one.

In general I suggest investing in high quality appliances because you will use them all the time. Honor your body by purchasing wonderful appliances to help you maintain a healthy body – it’s an investment in your well-being.

The Best Raw Vegan Recipe Books

My local library is overflowing with raw vegan recipe books and I’m pretty sure I’ve borrowed every single one. I sifted through the library’s stash to help me decide which books to buy for my own raw food collection.

The first raw food recipe book I bought was Ani Phyo’s Raw Kitchen, and this is still my favorite. Ani’s recipe for black sesame sunflower bread continues to be one of my staples… I also like the recipe for her sundried tomato hummus and raw “sun burgers”.

The other book I use all the time is The Art of Living Raw Foods by Doreen Virtue and Jenny Ross. I love this book because it’s full of beautiful photos, and features the best raw lasagna recipe I’ve ever tasted.
I also love the raw marinara sauce, sprouted kamut black olive bread, and baja burritos.

Drawbacks of the Raw Vegan Diet?

The only drawback to the raw food diet is the inconvenience that arises when traveling or socializing. Though I find it easy to eat 100% raw in my own home, trying to maintain a raw vegan diet on the road or when socializing with friends can be somewhat boring.

Though I’ve become quite proficient at preparing and packing food for trips that require me to be away from home for a day or two, in the future I intend to loosen the reins and make exceptions when I’m away for longer periods of time or when I’m socializing. This is a conscious decision to eat cooked vegan food when eating raw is inconvenient. In the long run I think this will make it easier for me to stick with the raw diet.

The Adventure Continues…

If you feel inspired to switch from a traditional diet to a raw vegan diet, be aware that for most people, lasting dietary changes are an evolutionary process. In my own experience, eating raw was something that took three years to implement into my already-vegan routine.

I’ve experienced my ups and downs along the raw food path, but I can say with confidence that I have no intentions of returning to my old ways of eating. Though I don’t see anything inherently wrong with cooked food, I simply have no desire to eat it. For the most part I find cooked and processed food lifeless and unappealing.

I hope this article has inspired you to feed your bod with radiant, life-giving food. Until next time, bon appetit! :)

~

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Raw Vegan Brownies Recipe

“Let your food be your medicine, and your medicine be your food.”
~ Hippocrates

I tweaked a chocolate cake recipe to create these delicious raw vegan brownies I’ve been eating every morning for breakfast! I can’t tell them apart from regular baked brownies, although it’s been a while since I’ve had one of those. :)

Raw Vegan Brownies

1.5 cups organic walnuts
dash of sea salt
8 pitted organic medjool dates
1/3 cup raw cacao powder
1 tsp organic vanilla extract
2 tsp of water

In a food processor, grind the walnuts and salt until fine. Add the dates until dough forms, then continue to add the cacao, vanilla, and water. Scoop out a tablespoon full of dough and roll into a ball, then pat down into a circular mini-brownie shape.

You can eat the brownies exactly like this or add the following cashew frosting on top.

Cashew Frosting

1.5 cups organic cashews
Juice of 1 lemon
2 tablespoons raw honey or agave nectar
.5 cup water

Blend all ingredients in a VitaMix blender until combined. Spoon frosting on top of brownies and sprinkle with ground walnuts.
~

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Yogi Wisdom from Calvin Hawn

Calvin Hawn, 1955 - 2010

This article is a compilation of my favorite quotes and tweets from my late friend and yoga teacher, Calvin Hawn. Calvin made his radiant debut on Twitter in March 2010 and was known for his compassionate and heart-based thoughts of love and gratitude.

Calvin’s Twitter bio reads, “I am committed to kindness, loyalty, and empowering authenticity.” It is inspiring how clearly his tweets mirrored his intention.

It is my hope that the following wisdom will continue to illumine many people in the years to come, as I know in my heart that uplifting others was Calvin’s life purpose.

    Calvin Hawn on Giving:

  • We spend most of our time in serving ourselves. The irony is that our deepest happiness is to be found in serving others.
  • You are either enriching and uplifting someone’s life – or you’re not.
  • “What goes around, comes around”; “what you sow, you reap”; “as you give, so shall you get”. Be kind and loving.
  • Take a stand for goodness in this world. Let your voice and actions be felt by all. Stand up and be counted.
  • Today, be sure to keep your eyes open for chances to be of service to others – small things can mean a lot – to both of you.
  • Thinking about world peace has merit – becoming world peace has much more. Start with yourself, model it and your impact will be magnified.
  • In service to others, you find your heart. In finding your heart, you invite peace and harmony into your life.
    Calvin Hawn on Kindness:

  • As you retire tonight, please set an irrevocable decision to become the kindest person you can possibly become. Nothing is more important.
  • Try patience today – all day. When you find yourself wanting to react, breathe deeply and say ‘I am a patient person’ – smile & be kind.
    Calvin Hawn on Gratitude:

  • Have you seen beauty in the world today?
  • It’s spring. Hallelujah. I look around and see that I could never see the full magnitude of Earth’s beauty, it is so vast – love it.
  • The sun is shining brightly, the air is brisk and all is well. It is a good day to celebrate our good fortune.
  • Whatever is happening in your life, be of good cheer, for in everything you experience there are excellent lessons to assist your growth.
    Calvin Hawn on Love:

  • Let love fill your dreams tonight; and when you rise tomorrow, set your intention to give and receive love all day.
  • Today’s challenge: tell someone you love them – someone you wouldn’t normally tell. It will make both your days.
  • As you prepare for bed tonight, ask how might you might best love and serve tomorrow.
  • Let love be your guide all day today – allow your heart to guide you in all you do.
  • One of the best investments you will ever make in yourself is to decide to become unconditionally loving. The rewards will be massive.
    Calvin Hawn on Spirit:

  • Your Spirit guides you in WHAT to do and WHEN to do it. Your mind’s job is to work out the details – and that is its ONLY job.
  • How do you know when to do anything of import? When you “feel” or “sense” the rightness of time – your Higher Self directs you.
  • Your Higher Self loves unconditionally. When you hold resentment, you are out of balance with yourself and that is always destructive.
  • Quit resisting.
  • Becoming enlightened is an active process, created by reclaiming what you have shut down so you can participate fully in your own life.
  • Our higher selves are constantly giving us input that will help us – the question is, are we listening? Being too busy can be a form of ADD.
  • You are spectacular beyond your wildest imaginings. Decide to step into your power and live the life you have dreamed of.
  • Be guided by your heart – it will lead with love and will never let you down.
  • I am in awe of nature. The wisdom of the creator is beyond my scope of comprehension – breath taking – and I give thanks.
    Calvin Hawn on Intention:

  • Decide right here and right now to have just the best evening.
  • Getting everything you want in life is simple: think it, desire it, decide to go for it, commit, and take inspired action.
  • Everything you want starts as a thought. Next you become it in your mind. Finally it unfolds in your physical world. The order is firm.
    Calvin Hawn on False Beliefs:

  • Set no limitations on yourself – it matters not what anyone has told you that you can or can’t do – what do they know about you, anyway?
  • Judging right and wrong is a waste of time. What is, is – we have done the best we can to date. What’s important is where we are going.
  • Learning to let go of attachment is learning to embrace sweetness in life.
  • So much stress and grief are experienced as a result of people defending their beliefs. Rumi had it right – let it go.
  • Justifying negativity and holding on to it is one of the single most self destructive acts one can commit. “Let it be” – let it go.
    Calvin Hawn on Relationships:

  • Occasional solitude is essential to well being. If you can’t be alone with yourself, you will never live harmoniously with others.
  • Most important skill ever – relationship building. Remember – “No-one cares how much you know, until they know how much you care”.
  • There is nothing more important than learning to like & love yourself and others – it’s a full time job, requiring constant vigilance.
  • Want great friendships? It’s very simple – be genuinely friendly in all situations and to everyone. That’s it. “Genuine” is the key word.
  • Quick tip to improve your relationships: Talk less – listen more. It works like magic. People who feel heard feel cared for.
  • Compassion, especially to those who most push your “buttons”, is a wonderful attribute. You cannot judge for you know not their past.
  • If you truly want to increase your capacity to love, work on deepening your compassion – for self and others. There is nothing worthier.
  • Whenever you find yourself tempted to react, hold your tongue, and seek first to understand. Verbalize only after contemplation.
  • If you are not being true to yourself, just who – or what – are you being true to?
    Calvin Hawn on Parenting:

  • Parents – keep things in perspective. There is NOTHING that is more important than raising your children. Prioritize time with them.
  • If you have children and are not treating them as the most precious aspect of your entire life, your thinking is awry – time to re-evaluate.
  • Providing deep and unconditional love/caring to a young person makes a positive difference to her entire life – a wonderful investment.
  • On a deep level, children need to feel your love for them to be healthy and have good relations with you. Show that love often every day.
  • Children need at least one adult in their lives to spend meaningful time with them – proximal separation does not count (look it up).
  • Technology is wonderful – but it’s taking a toll on our kids. Since when should computers, I-phones and i-pods take the place of parents?
  • Driving children to lessons is not the best form of quality time with them. They need 1 on 1, eyeball to eyeball, heart to heart time.
  • Spend quality, fun time with your children now, or fight with them later on when they’ve given up on you. It’s your choice.
  • Happy children (children are happy if they believe you care for and value them – showing them, not telling them) makes for happy parents.
  • Even 20 minutes per day of quality, focused time with your children will pay huge dividends in the nature of your relationship with them.
  • Children get their values from their parents. If the parents are too busy to spend quality time, they will get their values elsewhere.
    Calvin Hawn on Yoga:

  • Maybe I’m biased, but I truly don’t know anything as good as yoga for balancing yourself. Nah, I’m not biased – it’s true!
  • I have no religion. But, if Yoga were a religion, that would be mine.
  • Yoga – good for everything that ails you!
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Life after a Death

“What really matters is love and kindness.
Judging right and wrong is a waste of time.”
~ Calvin Hawn

Even though death is a part of life, you never really feel prepared to handle it. A couple days ago, I was shocked to discover that my friend and fellow yogi – Calvin Hawn, was killed in a car accident on Tuesday morning. Calvin was one of the most radiant people I have ever met. He was a brilliant dentist and yoga teacher who infused every lucky person he encountered with love and appreciation.

I ran into Calvin less than two weeks ago at our local library. He gave me a great big bear hug, and said we should meet for tea sometime soon. We’d been trying to arrange a time to get together for the past couple months to discuss the work of Abraham-Hicks. It’s ironic that during our last Abraham conversation, Calvin and I talked about death. I remember him looking me straight in the eye with an infectious smile as he said, “I’m not afraid to die”.

I don’t believe in accidents, and I don’t believe in “death”, but it’s still difficult to understand how someone so precious to the planet could be here one day, and gone the next. The only thing that makes sense to me is that that more often than not, death is a powerful reminder of how to live.

When someone we care about dies, it reminds us that life is fragile and sacred. Each moment that passes is an opportunity to be fully present and grateful for this amazing experience called Life. It’s important to cultivate love with each other while we’re here, because it’s one of the only things that continues to exist after we’ve passed away.

Calvin Hawn, 1955 - 2010

In the short time I knew Calvin, he reminded me of what Life is all about – to spread love and to be grateful. His spirit inspires me to inspire others, and motivates me to shine as brightly as I can while I’m here. At his funeral today, someone said, “to think of Calvin is to think of thankfulness”…

So thank you dear Calvin, for being my teacher and my friend.

“Life is full of beauty. Notice it”.
~ Calvin Hawn

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Raw Vegan Date Square Recipe

“We all love animals.
Why do we call some “pets” and others “dinner?”
~ K.D. Lang

This morning I had a craving for a traditional date square, just like mom used to make! Not wanting to break my raw vegan momentum, I put my chef’s hat on and “un-cooked” up this raw version. I ate them for breakfast with a tall glass of almond milk. Enjoy!

Raw Vegan Date Squares

Crust:
3/4 cups shredded unsweetened organic coconut
3/4 cups almonds
1/4 cup pitted organic dates
dash of salt

In a food processor, combine the coconuts, almonds, and salt until fine. Add the dates until dough forms, then press half of the mixture into a 5×7 rectangular pan.

Date Filling:
- 1 cup pitted organic dates
- 1/4 cup water

Blend dates and water in food processor until smooth and creamy. Add more water if needed. Gently spread the filing onto the crust with a spatula, then add the other half of the crust mixture on top. Press down with your hands or a potato masher to pack the date squares firmly into the pan. Place in the fridge to set for an hour or two before cutting.

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Anusara Yoga – Video

“Goodness and divine beauty can always be found if you adjust your vision just right.”
~ John Friend

I’m so excited to present a new video that reflects my passion for Anusara yoga! A big thanks to my beautiful friend and teacher Mindy Willis for helping me create this vid, Alex at Brickhouse Productions for the jib, and Brenda McMorrow for the amazing music. If you enjoy this video please consider making a donation as your contribution helps me to continue to create these vids and for free. Enjoy!

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